Irony how this is quite a big theory and I am sure that not many know of but yes I will have to touch on this because, I find its validity, not for me but the theory on "Theory on Relationships" that was mentioned in Part 1 is relevant. So whats so big about this theory? I don't know, you tell me. So read on.
Triangular Theory of Love
Robert Sternberg, a psychologist who created such a term for something so intangible. Love. Three parts to this theory, according to the triangular theory,
- Intimacy component
"Feelings of attachments, closeness, connectedness and bondedness." Most probably means something or someone that you have really treasured for a very long time, a best friend, a long lost lover or even your parents. Always believed and values each other.
- Passion component
"Drives connected to both limerence and sexual attraction." Does not fully means you are an addict to the sex your partner gives you but maybe how she walks, they way she blinks her eyes at you, the small details about the things she does might give you this strong compulsive attraction. The way you see things are always pleasant when you see him/her.
- Decision/commitment component
"The decision to remain with another, and in the long term, plans made with that other." In simpler terms, professional. Things have been set straight about the relationship and both parties agrees without any doubts and questions asked. (I personally like this the most but there are flaws to it, urgh why. . .)
Let me quote directly from my source again, "The amount of love one experiences depends on the absolute strength of these three components, and the type of love one experiences depends on their strengths relative to each other." Its not some fancy sentence that you cannot understand. It is as easy as that. Really? Lets continue. (Bare in mind that I still have to cover a little bit of info that is "lacking" in my previous post.)
Sternberg always believed that progress and evolution when it comes to love is very much predictable. Couples who are in love will experience all three factors in similar patterns and most probably different scenarios. What makes it so big is that there is actually a table for you to see where your relationship is at now and that scares me when you think you know more than what you need to know. On the other hand, you are aware of things. Maybe you can save your dying relationship, maybe save someone elses. How? I do not know because cases differ from each and everyone.
This theory, its too simple to understand but then again, theories are suppose to be easy to understand. This theory too, is just a description specifically to loving relationships, it does not include a non-loving relationship (those relationships you have with your normal friends that you say hi & bye to) that you might have known of.
The cool part about this theory is that, "What happens when you are having maybe more than one corners of this Triangular Theory of Love?" There are legit names that Mr Robert Sternberg came out with. If you are dying to know more, here's the link.
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Triangular_theory_of_love
Read up on it, (may or may not be legit to you but my 2 cents is that you read it with an open heart please & thank you) check out the table our friendly Wikipedia has come out with. Maybe only then it would answer some questions that you have been asking yourself. Just so you know, you are not alone in this world facing similar problems about relationships. So lets work this out together!
Back to my previous post, "Theory on Relationships" (part 1), in example two, you can see that there are people whose fire of love just dies off. In the "Triangular Theory of Love", it states that, "Sternberg believed that passionate love will diminish as the positive forces of the relationship is taken over by opposite forces. This idea comes from Solomon's opponent-force theory."
There was not any commitment in the relationship that Carly and Donald had. Working hand in hand with "Theory on Relationships", the 3 factors also did not have any effects on their "love story". Hence the break up.
Note to self: Do some research on Solomon's opponent-force theory.
Burning information or theories that you think I can share with my readers?
Email me at theoryaboutanything@gmail.com
Thankyou!
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